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Are We Too Fast for Awe?

On June 18, 2024 by Lauren Elkins

Kids and awe

When Dominic was little, I kept a paper bag of cracked corn in the back of my Toyota RAV4. We’d take it out at the park and throw handfuls to the ducks. I loved watching his face light up as the ducks came running. He’d point with his stubby little finger, and I’d whip out my phone to capture the moment. And, shocker, I wasn’t checking my notifications or scrolling through an app.

When Gabbi was little, we let her try everything we were eating for dinner. She’d smash pasta noodles in her chubby hands, suck on corn cobs, and gum at burritos, getting food all over her face. I took tons of pictures and videos of her glorious messes. I probably checked my phone during those meals, too.

For my kids, these were firsts, full of awe.

How often do I feel awe?

I’m not experiencing ducks or foods for the first time anymore. I’ve become numb to the everyday wonders around me.

I’ve been thinking about awe lately. Do I still feel it? Can I get it back?

Drs. Dacher Keltner and Jonathan Haidt coauthored a paper about awe, defining it as “being in the presence of something vast and mysterious that transcends your understanding of the world.” They identified eight wonders of life where we experience awe:

1. Moral beauty (the kindness and bravery of others)
2. Collective effervescence (being swept up in a group event)
3. Nature (walking along a rushing stream)
4. Visual design (paintings, sculptures, etc.)
5. Music (hearing a moving song)
6. Life and death (witnessing birth or loss)
7. Spirituality (peaceful feelings from meditation, prayer, etc.)
8. Epiphanies (gaining understanding)

And they told me what awe can do for me:

• Promotes concentration and rigorous thinking
• Encourages community and connection
• Relieves depression and anxiety
• Can even reduce inflammation
• Promotes modest sympathetic arousal

Experiencing awe activates our parasympathetic nervous system, shutting down our fight-flight-fawn responses and helping our bodies produce inflammation-fighting cytokines.

Michael Amster wrote in The Power of Awe, “Awe is calming, settling, and grounding, but it also awakens and activates us. It makes us more open, curious, playful, and humorous.”

How I’ve lost it

I’ve forgotten how to feel awe. Yes, that’s what I’ve decided.

“Awe is everywhere around us,” Amster wrote. “It’s just that we’ve lost the ability to see the wonder and beauty of everyday life.”

When it starts to rain, what do I think about? My hair getting frizzy? The dog getting stinky? That leak we’ve had near the skylight? Instead, have I ever noticed the shape and iridescence of a raindrop on the car window?

I read an article in Real Simple about awe and how the American culture makes it hardered to experience it. In cross-cultural studies, Americans scored the lowest in having a natural propensity for awe. Why?

• America is too individualistic. Awe is tied up with connection, community, and the natural world.
• We have too much wealth, which dampens awe. Research shows those with less are more reliant on their networks, more connected, and care more about others.

So do I have a chance? Or am I too old? Too jaded? Too American?

Where to start?

I’ve learned I should always start with easy. This comes from college. When I had to sit down with a college counselor to get back on track, academically. I had worksheets to help me set goals. But the counselor (an English professor, Louise), looked at my goals and basically said, “You can’t do these. You’ll fail.” If I wasn’t going to bed before 4:00 am, why did I think I would suddenly go to bed at 10:00 pm? She had me adjust that goal to 1:00 am. It felt like cheating. But she actually wanted to see my succeed.

So to relate that to feeling awe, I go back to the list of eight wonders and pick some easy ones:

• Be a part of a community.
• Listen to music.
• Enjoy art.
• Volunteer.

I learned about this study: An experiment had people over 75 go on a vigorous walk once a week for eight weeks. One group simply walked, while the other group took “awe walks,” tapping into a childlike sense of wonder. They were told to enjoy panoramic views, look closely at leaves or flowers, etc. Both groups took selfies on their walks. At the end of the study, the “awe walkers” reported lower stress levels, and their selfies included more of the world around them. “If you cultivate everyday awe, you will become more open,” observed the scientists.

The AWE method

Here’s what else I’m going to do:

Try the AWE method: A: Attention W: Wait E: Exhale and Expand

Focus on something I value in or find amazing.
Pause, inhale deeply, and as I exhale, make it slightly longer than the inhale, concentrating on whatever feelings come up and letting those sensations fill me.

I have experienced awe as an adult, but it’s easiest to think of it in “big” moments. In the obvious, awe-inspiring moments: a Christmas concert with the Tabernacle Choir and Orchestra, my kids being born, my wedding reception, watching my nephew win a track race, sitting in a packed theater for the midnight release of The Return of the King, and everyone cheering when the lights went out.

But I’m going to find daily awe. I’m going to build my “awe muscle.”

Awesome.